I was making my annual pilgrimage through Sherwood Forest recently. Everyone does it around this time of year. And until this year I thought everyone also got stopped by a band of merry men. Apparently the band has changed a little bit. First off, not every traveler was getting stopped and shaken down. I then contemplated that and figured probably 10% wouldn't get shaken down because Robin Hood would be looking out for the bottom earning 10.
I counted. It wasn't 10%, it was 40%. Robin Hood was letting 40% of the people get through scot(sp?) free! On the bell curve that seems a little lopsided. As I stood in line waiting my turn to get shaken down I found out from those emerging that another 20% hardly lost a thing. So we are at 60%, right? It turns out Robin Hood targets 40% to pay everything he wants.
Now here is where my blood starts to boil. Robin Hood is supposed to redistribute the ill gotten gains from the rich to the poor. My gains weren't ill gotten. My wife and I worked our tails off for what we got. We don't mind paying a tribute to Mr. Hood to help out the less privileged, but he seems to be mighty generous with our money. In fact, there was a pamphlet in the Sherwood Forest visitors center that, in extremely fine print, said he, Mr. Hood and his jolly band of junket traveling fat cats, plans to increase their shake down in 2010.
I know there are some reading this that find themselves in the aforementioned 60% to whom the band, and may I say that Little John looks a lot like Nancy Pelosi, don't harass. Count yourselves lucky! But recall the question from yore; "Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee." Today you may not be paying, but you will soon, whether it is in tribute to Hood or by losing a job because the economy simply can't sustain itself on such a wildly unbalanced distribution.
I also want to send a note of caution to those who don't pay tribute to Mr. Hood. Don't complain when others don't pay tribute either. If someone makes it into the Forest, documented or not, and doesn't pay, that doesn't increase what you ain't payin. So unless you payin, you ain't complainin.
So I'm traveling lighter now. We're bloodied and missing a suitcase or two. We're headed back home to work and try to survive this year before Little John screws things up too bad. (sHe was just saying how misunderstood the French are and how nice they are. We should just try to understand them and surely they won't want to cross the channel and conquer us, rape the women and pillage the country. Lord, how naive do they get? She even donned a headscarf like the French wear and called it Macaroni.)
I counted. It wasn't 10%, it was 40%. Robin Hood was letting 40% of the people get through scot(sp?) free! On the bell curve that seems a little lopsided. As I stood in line waiting my turn to get shaken down I found out from those emerging that another 20% hardly lost a thing. So we are at 60%, right? It turns out Robin Hood targets 40% to pay everything he wants.
Now here is where my blood starts to boil. Robin Hood is supposed to redistribute the ill gotten gains from the rich to the poor. My gains weren't ill gotten. My wife and I worked our tails off for what we got. We don't mind paying a tribute to Mr. Hood to help out the less privileged, but he seems to be mighty generous with our money. In fact, there was a pamphlet in the Sherwood Forest visitors center that, in extremely fine print, said he, Mr. Hood and his jolly band of junket traveling fat cats, plans to increase their shake down in 2010.
I know there are some reading this that find themselves in the aforementioned 60% to whom the band, and may I say that Little John looks a lot like Nancy Pelosi, don't harass. Count yourselves lucky! But recall the question from yore; "Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee." Today you may not be paying, but you will soon, whether it is in tribute to Hood or by losing a job because the economy simply can't sustain itself on such a wildly unbalanced distribution.
I also want to send a note of caution to those who don't pay tribute to Mr. Hood. Don't complain when others don't pay tribute either. If someone makes it into the Forest, documented or not, and doesn't pay, that doesn't increase what you ain't payin. So unless you payin, you ain't complainin.
So I'm traveling lighter now. We're bloodied and missing a suitcase or two. We're headed back home to work and try to survive this year before Little John screws things up too bad. (sHe was just saying how misunderstood the French are and how nice they are. We should just try to understand them and surely they won't want to cross the channel and conquer us, rape the women and pillage the country. Lord, how naive do they get? She even donned a headscarf like the French wear and called it Macaroni.)
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2 comments:
Very nicely done sweetheart. :)
I only have one thing to say to save you from your travels in the big bad forest....
VOTE REPUBLICAN
Very nice blog, Aaron :)
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